Tuesday, October 09, 2007

How Would You Feel?

Seriously, I would like to hear your answers. Here's the deal: I was talking on the phone to my Missy girl Monday, chatting away about this and that. Suddenly, her voice lowered and she became serious.

"Mom." You know the tone, like let me get your attention, please. "I have something I want to tell you but I don't want to upset you."

Oh dear, now how does a Mom not succumb to a good pre-freak-out upon hearing those words? Still, I just couldn't see anything being all that bad, as I've been managing to stay intimately informed of her world, comparatively. So, I drew a deep breath and replied, "Okaaaay. Shoot."

Well, she proceeded to describe how the ex-boyfriend Diego destroyed -- tore up -- all the layouts I'd created for him. For weeks now, he's been acting like a lost soul, in control one minute and wildly nuts the next. He's left numerous nasty / goofy comments on Missy's MySpace; it often seems to Missy that he stalks her at meal times in the cafeteria or en route to class while acting like it's random chance; and a mutual friend of theirs from high school calls and extends way too many invites to come visit their dorm room to hang out (like the old days), promising Diego will not be there yet there he is every time Missy has accepted as if the friend is being used to force a meeting, thereby making it really difficult to continue to be friends all the way around.

Nothing he's done has deterred Missy from her desire to remain broken up and in fact his actions confirm to her her decision was the correct one. So, I guess him destroying the layouts was a lash-out in frustration or something. Seems a little too overboard to me, though, since the ones he has up at school do not have Missy in them at all.

At first, my response was to just shrug my shoulders and say, well it figures. As if, I don't care. But as yesterday wore on, I did care. A Lot. And I did not feel a stitch of anger, but just a spreading sadness.

Missy continued, "I feel bad cuz I know that although you support my decisions 100%, you were sad we broke up cuz you were really fond of him."

So true, so true.

Which is why, I suppose, I am feeling sadness about what he did.

Not only did he tear them up, he threw them on his floor and left them there. She saw them and confronted him about it. He said he couldn't stand to look at them. She said, you could have given them back to my Mom. She would have liked to have layouts of you in her scrapbook. She's still very fond of you and was sad we broke up.

She said he didn't even seem to care. Well, geez, I know that says more about him and how he handles stuff than it does about whether he wants to hurt me or not, so I don't believe he wanted to hurt me. It just saddens me that my creations can lead such a precarious life once they leave me. Or be thought of as just so much paper.

Ever had anything similar happen to you? Just curious. Because now I'm not that willing to scrap for the new boyfriend, even though Missy has already asked me. Or for her roomie, even though she's asked me. Makes me really wish I knew how to do digital scrapbooking and enjoyed it. It suddenly made me realize that you never really give those away. You just give away copies.

I guess I need to sit down and discuss with Missy, and see if digital will do for those two friends. Wow, never thought this kind of thing would be my motivation to actually cross the scrap platform. Just goes to show we never know, from day to day, do we?

Okay, Channel Change! lol

Daily Card Trick
I said I was gonna drag them out, one a day, so here we go. Birthday card for one of my nephews who turns 11 today. Happy Birthday, Teddy!
I must be getting hard-core in my use of scraps, because I didn't even try to mesh old with new on this card, even in the midst of my boy-card phobia. My approach was remarkably hard-ass. Like, I didn't even put real buttons over the fake ones like I usually do. To be fair, though, that's a kind of girly treatment, anyway. I chose the postage stamp deco scissors to trim the edges of these 3 year old die cut card elements, and cobalt blue ink for the edges. Also a couple of Dymo tape words to fill in for words I didn't have die cuts for. Yup, the creating went fast too.

I need to whack out about 30 dozen of these kind of cards and make some kind of material dent in my scraps and stash. Sure. On my To-Do voodoo, fo sho.

Well, the need to take the trash cans to the curb is calling my name, so I'll close this for today and play Beat the Garbage Truck, hehe. Hubs conveniently forgot it was trash day, I guess. That's okay, I'm the Crack-Filler-Inner, doncha know. Have a great Tuesday, everybody!


Rachael said...

Wow! I would be very hurt. I'm sorry that he did that. HUGS!!

What a fun card!!!

Have a great day!!

grandmascraps said...

I realize a gift is not a gift until you give it away, but having a creation destroyed in that manner would really upset me. Not sure i can be content with Digi scrapping. I need the textures and depth of the real thing. JMO

csimmers said...

Aimes, I totally understand how you feel. There are a few of my friends that I have made albums for, ones where all they have to do is slap the pictures down. One, in particular, said "well are you going to put the pictures in it? And, the colors don't match what I have. You should have just gotten my pictures and done the pages that way." Yeah, definitely not EVER getting a handmade item from me again. It really hurt my feelings. I'm not sure everyone understands that art/craft projects are works of love.

Linda said...

I'm sorry that happened to you. It is hard to control what happens to our creations once they leave us. This is why I only make things for people that I know will appreciate it 100%.

Your card is cute, I love how you made your stash look fresh.

KarenSue said...

I don't know how I'd feel about the layouts.

but, I'd be more concerned about your dd. any ex with such behaivior makes me really nervous.

Gina (frazzledmom) said...

Hey Aimes! So tickled that you popped in to see me. Thanks for your kind words. And I gotta tell ya - I'm upset about your LO's being destroyed. We put so much of ourselves into our work, and of course it's hurtful to have them damaged and discarded! :(

Renee said...

So sorry your layouts were destroyed. I would be sad too.

Maria said...

I think your daughter ex'es action reflect more on how important he felt your layouts were as opposed to how little they meant to him. We tend to destroy things in the manner that he did more so when we place a certain significance on a particular item, especially pictures.

I've destroyed a few pictures way back when I was a bit immature but they evoked so much emotions. I think that's the reason why he destroyed them. . .not because they were unimportant.

Hopefully, he'll move on and hope he doesn't get all psycho and such!

Hope you're doing well Aimeslee!!

Talk to ya later!


barbara said...

Hi Aimeslee,

I'm sorry about your layouts. I think his reaction is more one of his youth and immaturity. When he gets to be our age and older, he may miss not having those wonderful pages to look back on. It was petty and childish - and I don't know too many guys his age who aren't just that. Fortunately your daughter realized it in time.

I wouldn't want to be a young woman today. I wish your Missy girl all the luck in the world. I'll help my own sunshine swim through those rough seas in due time. It just can't be easy.