Finally...

Finally, I think I am officially off *Depends Suicide Watch*. I'm still not well yet, but I'm definitely on the mend and happy to be there. I'm still coughing, but not like a couple of days ago, when the post-nasal drip got so dang bad that after awhile my abs popped their elastic band and died, leaving me with nothing but the well-earned nickname I.P. Freely.

At one point, I was yelling to God at 3 a.m. after being stuck on the toilet for hours, because every time I tried to stand up I'd have another coughing fit and pee my pants even though I'd just relieved myself more than relief deserves.

I truly cannot remember an attack this bad ever in my life. Which is why I still think that I had a cold at first, and then it morphed into allergies gone wild. The doc said I had no fever and no sign of infection, and that both cold viruses and allergies are rampant right now. He said my immune system is fragile right now because of the arthritis meds and therapy I'm on, so theoretically both could have hit me.

But, back to my diaper story...

I am ashamed to say that I ended up actually buying a package of Depends, or rather, Hubs did. I initially felt I owed him a big one for doing that, until it became so difficult talking him into doing it that it wiped out all my feelings of goodwill. Let's just say I'm glad I'm in menopause, because he always refused to buy tampons, too. He had absolutely no sympathy with the possibility of me having a coughing fit and peeing my pants in the middle of CVS trying to buy them myself.

So, how did I talk him into it? I simply reminded him, "okay, then don't blame me when one day you might be shitting all over yourself and need a diaper, and I pull the same crap you're pulling now."

That did the trick. :-)))) But you know that old saying about needing stuff only when you don't have it? Fate intervened. Within hours of my receipt of said dreaded diapers, I began to improve. I was able to go get my steroid shot and the diapers remain unopened, forever to remain in the bathroom cabinet when truly needed. By either one of us. winkwink

Oh, I do wanna pass on a home remedy Hubs picked up at work: rub Vick's Vapo-rub all over the bottoms of your feet and put on some socks, and you will stop coughing for a few hours. I did it and it worked for me. This has been discussed on Snopes but no conclusions were reached either way. Another great thing it does is soften the heck out of the skin on my soles. Seriously. It's become a new tradition for me.

So, anyway, word of advice to you younger ladies who still have abs that work: Youth, Thy Name is Kegal!